Shannon was an amazing person. She was the strongest person I have ever known. She never gave up, She fought this cancer to the very end. She worried more about everyone than herself. She wanted so badly to be here for the kids. I have been thinking for weeks, to come up with a nice tribute, to finish her blog. This is how I think it should be. I'm going to need some help. Shannon touched alot of people near and far, I would like everyone to send a comment about what Shannon ment to you. I'm going to start it , but I would like to hear from as many people as we can.Even if you only want to say hi and where your from.Thank you. Shannon will be missed, but never forgotten.
In a sad and upsetting time
we were there for you.
Yet you left before our eyes
and there was nothing for us to do,
except let you go.
For you, there was no more suffering,
no more pain and the
need and use of medication.
You are now in a place where you belong,
Heaven.
Now you can live in peace.
Sure, we will miss you dearly, but we
know you are up there looking down on us.
I am proud to be a daughter of a fighter.
Alannah
Rewind to the summer of '98. There she was across the yard. I didn't know it at the time, but she was to be the love of my life. Shannon and her sister moved to the house behind my best friends Pete and Denise. She started Alannah in Denise's daycare. I asked Denise to fix us up. On our very first date, I knew she was the one. I could picture myself growing old with her. It felt like I knew her for years. I know it might sound like BS to some, but it truly was love at first sight. Christmas day 1998 I proposed to her, She was the best present I ever gave to myself. I loved her with everything I had. I know she loved me. I don't regret a single moment that I spent with her. She gave me two beautifull children. I gave her the loving family she needed. She gave me love and comfort. I gave her support and strength, with a little humor thrown in. We made a great team. I will still always love her.
This is a poem written by Alannah for Shannon
In a sad and upsetting time
we were there for you.
Yet you left before our eyes
and there was nothing for us to do,
except let you go.
For you, there was no more suffering,
no more pain and the
need and use of medication.
You are now in a place where you belong,
Heaven.
Now you can live in peace.
Sure, we will miss you dearly, but we
know you are up there looking down on us.
I am proud to be a daughter of a fighter.
Alannah
40 comments:
Although seldom making myself known here, I've been following Shannon for quite a long time...Her candor and humor throughout her experiences, I think, is a testament to the human spirit. I really believe that with unique style, she showed us what strength and goodness we all share somewhere in us. I will miss her posts, and I will be keeping your family in my prayers. Peace to you and your two beautiful children.
I happened upon Shannon's blog one day just by chance. Immediately, I could see that this was a special blog by a special person. I could not believe someone facing such odds could be so brave, so funny, and so inspirational. She allowed us to come along with her on her journey and that takes a lot of strength and courage. It goes to show that one person can make a huge difference in the world. Shannon certainly made one in mine. Because of Shannon, I have had a glimpse into the horrible world of melanoma- one that I will never forget. She taught me so much. What a beautiful tribute to Shannon. The poem brought tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for sharing Shannon with us and letting us into your lives. May God bless you.
What I loved about Shannon's blog was how honest she was about her fight,and funny too. She had a great sense of humour.She deffinately touched my life.She's probably giving them hell up above.Man she was a fighter.God bless you Shannon.
Martine/CA
Dear Ed,
Shannon was among the first people who emailed me from the MPIP when I started posting there two years ago. From that first email, I got a glimpse of her sense of humor which I immediately liked. I also saw what a compassionate woman she was and after her recurrence was amazed by her strength. I am so glad to have gotten to know Shannon through the MPIP and her blog. She was such an honest, gifted writer and artist and I've gone back to the blog entry many times where she posted her original art.
Alannah's beautiful poem is such a lovely tribute to her mother as is this post which you wrote. I also appreciate your sharing the DVD which you posted the link to on the MPIP. Shannon's smile was like no other.
My heart and thoughts are with you, Alannah and Ryan. I am sad that Shannon didn't get her cure but the wisdom in Alannah's poem says it all. As ever, Carver
What do I say about my sweet friend Shannon? I've been wondering that for awhile now since I wanted to write something to the kids. I'm somewhat at a loss. I just have this empty feeling - I keep thinking I'm going to call her or she's going to call me. Or I'm going to open up my in box and have a message from her.
Shannon was an important part of my life for the last four years. We met at a scary time for each of us and discovered so much in common while we clung together, holding hands on this terrible rollercoaster. While melanoma was what brought us together and bound us tightly, our friendship transcended that. I was so lucky to have her in my life. She supported me unconditionally. She understood what I was going through and helped me keep perspective, hope, and laughter. And she allowed me to share in her life and her struggle. That meant the world to me.
I will be forever grateful that I had the chance to come to Delaware and visit her in person. I know she wasn't feeling well and didn't often remember too much of the time we spent together but it meant so much to me to just be able to throw my arms around her and tell her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me.
Shannon was so funny - always in a sarcastic, self deprecating way. Such a dry wit. Cracked me up! And she loved Ed and her kids with a fierceness that belied her quiet nature.
I hate that she was in pain and scared. I hate that she wasn't able to beat the disease back. But it wasn't for lack of trying or lack of effort. She was amazing - so strong and so strong willed, never wanted to give up.
My life, and this world, is a lonelier place without her. I miss her.
Love,
Amy
I was deeply touched by Shannon's battle. My husband is also stage 4 melanoma, and in a battle for his life right now. Shannon always had a caring word to express, even in the midst of her own personal battle and suffering. She and my husband are the same age, and some of their journey mirrors each other.
The thing that always drew me to Shannon was her honesty about how the beast screwed up her life, and how ticked she was about it. I have always tried to say the right words, to not be harsh, to channel my anger...and I loved getting on her blog and hearing her just bitch and tell it like it really was. Although I've always felt that she rolled with the punches when bad news came, she wasn't shy in letting everyone know how scared she was, how mad, or how unfair she thought it was. And she always had the right way to express how much she loved her family.
She was indeed a fighter, and you are right to be so proud. Hers is not a battle lost, as I've never believed anyone could really lose a battle fought so unfairly (on melanoma's part) and so gallantly (on Shannon's part). Hers was a battle in a war we all hope to win someday. Even to the end, Shannon still celebrated in the hope and promise, the good results of others in the same battle, even as her own was getting nasty.
She will not be forgotten. I wish you many blessings. I hope that you can find healing so that melanoma can't continue to hurt you in the loss of Shannon.
Jenni Halley, wife of Brian
MPIP friend
Maryville, MO
Dear Ed,
For me, like Carver, Shannon was someone I met early on at the MPIP.
I found her, and the rest of the online melanoma community after I had a recurrence of my mm after 20 yrs.
I was shocked and saddened when Shannon's mm returned.
She was always so upbeat, and such a fighter. I am so very sorry you have lost her.
We all miss her so much.
Dian in spokane
Kind. Generous. Caring. Brave. Strong.
What an amazing person. Through all of her trials, she never stopped thinking of others -- even strangers who knew her only through cyberspace. I wish that I could be half the person that Shannon was -- and still is, just in another place.
It must have been an amazing experience to know Shannon in person. Her spirit is an inspiration, and I fervently hope that her memory will sustain you all.
Shannon touched my life - I´m from Germany - and whenn ever I will be in fear, I will remember her strengthness and her wonderful humor. She is now an angel for her beloved ones.
She was such a great inspiration for thousands of people all over the world. I´m one of them. Thank you for your courage and this very special blog.
Shannon was so special. I was so sure she would beat this, that it makes it so much harder to accept. Ed, your tribute was beautiful and Alannah's poem amazing. I went to the same onc. and surgeon at Jefferson as Shannon and we discussed how we both loved them. Although, as many have said I felt like I really knew her well, from reading her blog, she was an amazing writer and so funny, not to mention her beautiful art work.
She will be missed by so many.
I just recently found Shannon's blog and she was a very courageous woman. Although I never knew her, just by reading her posts it seemed like I did, if that makes any sense.
You and your family are in my prayers.
I'm not even going to try to be as eloquent as the others who have already posted. Shannon was so special to so many of us.
I met Shannon on the MPIP Board when I was first diagnosed with melanoma in 2004. Shannon was supportive, positive and gave me some great advice.
Since that time we have emailed, talked once or twice on the phone and even corresponded with an occasional snail mail. I feel like I really got to know her by reading her Blog and speaking to others who spent time with her in person.
I never thought that melanoma would take this young woman's life until the last few weeks. Even then I hung onto hope and prayed for a miracle.
She couldn't have loved her husband and children any more than she did.
I miss you Shannon. You will never, ever be forgotten.
Cancer doesn't fight fair.
Stay Strong
Kathie (King)
Stage IV melanoma 7/05 Liver mets
For Shannon's family:
What stands out most in my mind about Shannon was her total and abiding devotion to her family. Throughout her illness, this rose above all else in importance.
She fought so valiantly to be there for all of you. Her fight against this disease was not in vain. In the process she taught so many of us the courage to face adversity with determination and grace.
Her spirit will certainly live on in all those who knew and loved her. May you be forever sustained by your memories of Shannon.
JMart
Shannon was the very first person that I had contact with when my husband Bill was diagnosed. She was also the first melanoma warrior I met when we were at the University of Pennsylvania the same day. I have followed her story and have been deeply moved by her strength and grace. Fly free now Butterflymom you are no longer in pain.
Charlotte
With the dignity afforded a true hero, the Warrior gently placed her sword on the ground. Not in defeat, but in Grace.
Shannon was joy...it was in her eyes (with a twinkle) and her lovely smile. Picture after picture, word after word, and the radiance never faltered.
I will always remember the kindness that flowed from her; I knew her only a short time from emails and her blog.
She leaves us courage always; a treasure for the world to find.
Kim Jones
Birmingham, AL
Several months ago, being diagnosed with non-melanoma skin cancer, I went searching the web for information and quite by accident landed on Shannon's site. That day's entry showed her sitting in her hospital bed with an expression on her face of such "this is me-ness" that I could not just walk away. I wanted to know her.
And I did! In the same way I might if I had come upon a diary, or a cache of letters. Or perhaps, a book, that you read and its stays with you forever. A story of a life that takes up residence in your mind, moves into a space there, and puts down roots.
When she passed away, the days felt haunted with her presence.
And I don't even know her! But I do! I do!
I don't have any great words. I am so sorry for your loss.
Shannon was an inspiration in her fighting spirit and her prodigious sense of humor. Her attitude in the face of all she had to fight was and is an inspriration.
Thank you, Shannon, for sharing yourself with us.
Even though I am a stranger, Shannon was an inspiration to so many. Even for those of us who don't have cancer. Her strength was unmatchable. Her humor was fanstasic. Living with her must have been such a wonderous joy.
Your mom was so proud of you and you must always remember that she lives strongly within you. She gave you life and thus, you give her life. You are so lucky to have Shannon as your mom. You couldn't have asked for anyone better.
Even though we will never meet, just know a stranger thinks of you and sends warm and wonderful blessings.
New York City
I have followed Shannon's journey for quite some time and have been praying for her and your entire family. She was an amazing woman with an unbelievable spirit.
I only hope that she is dancing in heaven. I don't doubt that she is looking down upon all of you.
You're a beautiful family. Thank you for sharing the lovely tribute of Shannon. She had beauty both inside and outside.
May God bless all of you. I mourn with you and wish you all peace. Try to cherish your memories as Shannon would want you to.
Godspeed.
I too met Shannon back in 2003 when I was first diagnosed as Stage I. MPIP was an important part of my working through a cancer diagnosis and all of us cried, laughed, learned and prayed together. In the past year, I have limited my time on the boards, but dropped in often enough to know that others still needed my prayers. Shannon will be missed and while I didn't meet her on this earth, I know that someday I will get a chance to celebrate the next life with a grand group of people already up there in the hummingbird corner watching over us all. Take care of us all-and especially your lovely family!
Ed, I hope you allow us to post comments for a little while. I'm still processing this and don't have the words to share.
I did post on the day of Shannon's Funeral on MPIP's mainboard. Please print those posts out also. Or I can for you.
I've emailed you privately also.
I'll come back when I can be more succinct but I wanted to let you know that Shannon was special to so many of us.
So so sad and unfair. Shannon was an extraordinary human being. I hate Melanoma.
There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about Shannon and the picture of her in her "Melanoma Sucks " shirt. She gives me my strength to continue to fight this horrible disease. She shared so much of what we all go through and yet she made sure she loved life, her children and Ed!!! I miss her dearly and wish she were still here!! I know we will meet up one day. Until then my dear friend Shannon...
Dear Ed, Alannah and Ryan,
there will always be a very special place in my heart for my dear and constant friend. She was so precious to so many of us on mpip. I met your wife and mother about 4 years ago on the mpip board and then we were in a couple of groups together..we poured our hearts out to each other and felt a true bond..I wish that I could have met her in person and that I will always regret but nontheless we had many chatty phone calls and shared lots of emails. I know this is a very difficult time in your lives but I do hpe you will find hope and strength in the many, many people that genuinely cared for Shannon. Love, sue
Shannon and I communnicated for several years before meeting this past May as she underwent the most difficult of all treatments for IL-2. During our time together we laughed, we cried, and had many long talks while also trying to give her some quiet time.
Shannon was so brave as she laid in her bed hooked up to tubes and constantly being poked and pricked. Her doctors and nurses were incredible filled with hope, concern and love for Shannon. At times she was scared and rightfully so, but, she NEVER GAVE UP HOPE. She had courage, strength and compassion for others as they fought their battle, alwasy thinking everone was more important than Shannon.
Shannon was a writer, an artist, a wife, a mother so filled with love for her beautiful family from whom she gained utmost strength. Shannon was reserved and yet witty. She would laugh in a quiet sort of way with a glimmer in her eye.
For those of us in the Melanoma World who knew her for a long time she was known as BUTTERFLYMOM.. Since Shannon's passing I have had a monarch butterfly hang out in my garden... I have no doubt it's Shannon and yes I do talk to her.
Shannon touched many in the Melanoma World with her art of Cafe Press, her group of special Melanoma Friends called Soul Sista's. IN her very quiet way, she touched many leaving an imprint on our hearts.
Shannon's beautiful family are amazing. Her husband Ed was always reassuring to her, her gave her the family and the love she needed, and so deserved. He gave her strength and in times of the greatest difficulty alwasy found a way to make her laugh.
Shannon's daughter Allanah, a very special young lady whom Shannon adored is filled with so much compassion and love. Allanah wrote an incredible poem for her Mom which brought everyone to tears at her Memorial service. She is so much like Shannon, quiet in her way filled with witt and love.
Ryan, a light in Shannon's life, filled with so much sense of adventure, funny, and an insatiable love for trucks and cars. I think one day he will be another Evil Knivel or a Nascar driver. He smiles and melts your heart.
Ed, Allanah and Ryan, may God's peace be with you during this most difficult time.
Love and Light
Carole
Dear Ed, Allanah and Ryan~
Ed, what you wrote was just perfect...and Allanah, honey..your poem reminds me so much of your Mommy...You have the same strength as her, inside your little self...and little Ryan, he defiantely posesses her spunk. :~) I know that you all much miss Shannon so very much, and my heart goes out to all of you....
I was fortunate enough to get to know your beautiful Wife and Mommy, when Shannon came into my life close to 4 years ago. From the very beginning, she was truly the most caring, compassionate girl...and I was so blessed that she chose to become my friend.
When you guys all came to my house that summer a few years back, it was just awsome. I will always treasure the pictures that I have of that day, remembering how all the kids played and how we talked like we had known eachother forever.
Soul Sistah's...that was our little group on the net, with a bunch of other girls. I hope that you read some of the beautiful messages written by Shannon on that Site, sometime. She loved all of you beyond belief and she expressed her feelings freely.
Her Art....My God, what a gift. When she would send me a card in the mail, it was usually one of her drawings of hummingbirds...I still have each and every one. I read them from time to time...She always knew just the right thing to say. I know that she shared her drawings, and they are so beautiful. She touched alot of people around the world by her artwork and her words.
I had said over and over to Shannon, that she is the strongest girl that I have ever known....so much strength inside such a little girl. It amazed me...and still does. I miss Shannon so much...I think of her each and every day.
Ed, Allanah...Ryan, I wish peace for all of you and your extended family, as you begin to try and heal. "The quiet girl at the back of the room, heard around the world"...will be remembered 4-ever by many, many people, including myself.
All my love, Faith Talucci~
There is a tribute for Shannon on Miss Melanoma's web-site too / you all need to read it. Just go to missmelanoma.com and go to the blog page and scroll down until you get to Shannon's tribute.
Thank you,
Texas
The Balm Of God's Love
by M.S.Lowndes
When we lose someone we love
The loss seems too great to bear
God sends us friends to comfort us
To show that He deeply cares
But in the dark hours of the night
When there’s nobody else around
When we feel the saddest and loneliest
It’s there God’s love can be found
It’s like a soothing, healing balm
To soothe our broken hearts
The healing oil poured over us
That flows into every part
We can rest secure in God’s love
And know He’s by our side
He holds us when we feel as though
A part of us has died
We can know that God will listen
When we just want to talk
And when we feel we need to cry
We can share it with the Lord
For He is always waiting there
Ready with arms open wide
As we pour out the hurt within
He pours His love inside
Our Father above loves us so much
And will never leave us alone
He will not forsake us in our need
To face this on our own
He comforts us and strengthens us
And rubs us with His balm
And as the dawn breaks through the night
We’ll awake in His loving arms.
Ed,
I wish I knew the words to say. Thank you so much for the beautiful tribute and for allowing us experience it.
Shannon was such a gift to us all, and I'll always treasure the advice and love she was so willing to dole out, even in her own troubled times. She made a difference in my life and so many others.
Wishing you and your family peace.
Words cannot express the emptiness felt in the Melanoma Community by those of us privileged to have known Shannon.
Shannon was a ray of light and sunshine in so many of our lives. I remember her story when I was collecting them to compile a book. It was heart warmaing, sensitive and filled with love. Shannon chose to find the gifts this beast brought her rather than dwelling on the difficulties.
Shannon fought one of the most courageous battles anyone could e4ndure. She fought and fought and when she didn't think she had anymore fight in her she fought some more. I recall spending four days in the hospital wiht her during the most grueling of all treatments a Melanoma patient couldf possibly go through.. We laughed, we cried, we talked and talked and talked some more while at the same time trying to let her have some private time.. Her wish was if she didn't make it for Ed , Allanah and Ryan to alwasy be together and go on with their lives..
After Shannon's passing Faith, another Melanoma Warrior sent an e-mail Shannon had written her in 2004... She refernced a song by Lee Ann Wolmack....I HOPE YOU DANCE. I HOPE YOU NEVER LOOSE YOUR SENSE OF WONDER....
Shannon wanted to make sure Ed, Allanah and Ryan live a full life, and not dwell on her loss. WE all understand that is easier said than done.
To many of us in the Melanoma Community Shannon was known as BUTTERFLY MOM.... Since I came back from Shannon's Services I have had a monarch butterfly hanging around a certain garden in my yard. I know in my heart it is a sign.... EVERYTHING'S ALRIGHT with Shannon.. As difficult as this is for me, I cannot even begin to comprehend the loss Ed and the children must be feeling.
Know you are alwasy in our hearts and will be here for you.
Love and Light
Carole
I know how much I miss Shannon and cannot imagine the loss you are feeling Ed.
Shannon was one of a kind. All who knew her from MPIP could hardly believe this wonderful woman with so much spunk and so much to share was taken from us all.
Rest in peace Butterfly Mom. I hope to connect again one day
Bill G
Dear Ed, Alannah and Ryan,
I want to thank you all so much for sharing your wonderful wife and mother with us all. She was truly a fighter and a great inspiration. She will live on forever in all the people she touched during her journey and also within yourselves. We are lucky to have been able to share, even a little, her presence here on earth. Let all the comments here and elsewhere be a comfort to you in your sorrow and healing. It is a tremendous tribute to Shannon and you all. May God Bless and watch over you all the days of your life.
MJ - Canada
I was blessed to find Shannon's blog, cause of C. Uporsky...I am a 2peas member known as highlandeyes. I feel that Shannon was blessed with a beautiful family and was taken way before her time, she was a beautiful individual with a strength that many will never have. My thoughts and prayers will be with her family and I can honestly say, I will now have a new outlook on cancer and all of the many victims of this UGLY disease...God Bless!!
I cant even begin....
I was one of the lucky ones that was blessed to know Shannon in person. Shannon and her beautiful family are my neighbors. I only wish I got to know her more.. one biggest regret in life will be not knowing the entire person she was. the quiet girl in the room is perfect. Why didnt I know she was such a talented artist. I only now know her pictures are on Tee shirts at cafepress.com under melanoma. She never mentioned it. Never bragged never showed off. But was always there to hear my stories. I would have loved it if she shared with me. I feel so selfish wishing I knew more and tons and tons of what ifs... I had the honor of watching her two beautiful children as Shannon was fighting her brave fight..I learned so much about shannon through them and what a fantasick mother she was and what a great job she was doing raising them and seeing her humor is going to be passed on.
Ed is and was her Knight in shining armor. Ed and Shannon are everything books and dreams are made of. I have always always thought that. You can see the love in everything they did. from BBQing with eachother to seeing ED comeing home from work on the cell phone talking to Shannon all the way home ( for quiet time, before seeing the kids) Seriously everyday. Ed just got home from work and you know it made me well up not seeing his ear piece in his ear.
Ed you can never ever say you didnt do enough or love Shannon enough. I pray that Alanna finds a husband like you..has the beauty talents and smarts of her mother.
I hope and pray Ryan grows up to be like you, and keeps his mothers humor and treats his wife like the princes,
I pray they both find love like you and Shannon have. I pray they will always know there mother loved them so much and faught for everybreath for her family.
I know Shannon is with you always and she should be soo proud of all she did.
Shannon is an Amazing woman.. I only wish I told her.
Love and prayers to all of you.
I will always miss you shannon.
Carolyn Anderson
Ed, Alannah and Ryan, Words cannot even begin to express how saddened I am for your loss. Shannon was a WIFE,MOM,FRIEND,WARRIOR,VERY BRAVE,VERY STRONG and Loved you unconditionally....From her blog entries she was very Funny and Made me laugh several times, She was a VERY FREE SPIRIT and her art was AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL!! She will be GREATLY Missed!!! I LOVED her bluntness in her blog entries.....I am so so sorry for your loss and I pray God will guide you and give you the strength you need to get you through this most difficult time. May God Bless and Hold You Close!!! Love, Tracie
Just dropping in to say hi...been missing our girl. Saw some very funny photos today and my first thought was of Shannon. Love from NV, sue
Ed,
You know what Shannon meant to me. She was the only one I ever truly called my girlfriend. I knew when I talked to her I would not be judged nor feel wrong for feeling the way I did. I hope I was able to do the same for her.
I always looked forward to seeing her. Not a day goes by that I dont think about her. She will always have a place in my heart right next to Zachary.
Always know how very much she loved you and the kids. You were her world.
She's missed and loved by many!
We will always be here for you and the children if/when you need us. We love you too.
Love always,
Denise
not forgotten...
Hey. Im Caitlyn. Im only 12 years old but this story touched my heart.I was looking up some research on melanoma and I came across Shannon's blog. Im very sorry for the loss of Shannon. But thank you for sharing her story, and touching our lives.
Peace Be With You
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